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August 09 2012

marriage02

Prepare yourself for the chase


Couples - The original plan for a woman’s existence is that she was created to meet the needs of her husband. This means that her role as a wife - was to enrich her husband’s life for the better and not for worse.

Unfortunately in our society ‘where the idea is that women should have equal rights to men’ - women have now become far more proactive than men in their search for their ideal mate. They are constantly on the prowl or lookout for ‘Mr. Right’, instead of preparing themselves for the chase.

It was God’s initial intent for man to seek out his bride. These roles began to change as a result in the shift of equality between man and woman. This is unnatural and inconsistent with the principle of marriage, as men should pursue women and not the other way around. Men were designed to seek, hunt, provide, and protect, but his role has since become diluted and devalued and this works against mans natural instincts.

We are doing ourselves a disservice by meddling with God’s perfectly thought out plan for marriage. Let’s sit down and ask ourselves what is it that we can do to prepare our hearts for the life commitments we want to make?

The first thing we need to do is to detoxify our spirits from all of the bad and misinformed indoctrination that our culture as accepted as right and equal. Where as a result, women find now themselves emotionally hurt, alone, broken, and having to start all over again. I am not implying that a woman cannot be extremely happy with a man that she sought after, but what I am suggesting is that seeking out a mate comes with risks and potential failure. When a woman is being pursued by a man it not only gives her a self-esteem boost but it is also more exciting. 

The beauty of natural and spontaneous order set out by God is that relationships flow naturally without stress, or unnecessary heartache.  If you ask God for this strong heroic mate with a heart made of gold, a degree from Yale, a job with a 401k income, a nice starter home for a family of three, and a few mutual funds with a good rate of return, what do you think would happen? I believe that your request would not be impossible or unrealistic, but the question remains…. from your list of must-haves, is what portion do you possess? 

Well - God is not going to send you a gift that you can’t handle, and nor should he. Put yourself in his shoes would he really desire a women with bad credit, a bad attitude, no education, selfishness, can’t maintain a home, self -esteem, a heart full of un-forgiveness, and even complains about the air she breathes! Does this really sound like the wife of a man’s dreams?

Ask God to wash and cleans your spirit, to modify your ways, heal your heart, forgive you of past failures, give you a sweet attitude, change your outlook on life, and turn your attention and focus over to him. Men are looking for a ‘lady’ not just a woman; they want the whole enchilada. If you desire to become a helpmate give yourself an internal makeover, it will help you to understand that your thoughts need to be redirected and adjusted so that the ‘real you’ can come forth. Make some new friends, pick up some new habits, and find a new interest that will help you on your journey.

Sometimes we want to be married because we are afraid of being alone. No woman wants to live a life without having experienced the safety and security of being captured by the strength of a man’s love, and the experience of his arms protecting her through the night. However - we need to love ourselves first, have self-control, and enjoy being valued and adored by God, because he knows what’s best for us.

Couples - If we surrender our will and selfish desires to God he will pour out his blessings on us that we are not worthy to receive. Relax and spend some quality time with yourself, do things that make you happy, go out with like-minded friends that share common interests, go places where you would feel comfortable meeting new people and experience a new flavor. God teaches us that ‘It is better to be alone than in the company of fools’. Don’t focus your attention on seeking a man, but focus on living and appreciating the extraordinary woman that God ordained you to be.

Remember and tell yourself this every day. . . You are a beautiful and pure gift that God made in his own image.  Start to look at yourself from God’s view, and as you grow with God’s heart – you will see how you are becoming a more suitable friend and partner for life. 

 

Author Biography

Mrs.   Tyeasha   Vaughn,   who   prefers   to   be   addressed   as   "Ty   Vaughn",   is   grateful   to   God   for   two

foundational gifts that serve as the basis for all that she does: 1) Having a heart for families, and 2)

Having the passion for children. These gifts led her to serving as a professional nanny for nearly two

decades during which time she developed an even stronger character, grew in patience and expanded

her knowledge and awareness of cultural, faith-based, and interpersonal nuances that allowed her to

meet the distinct needs of each family. With decades of experience navigating the sensitive world of

child   care   and   its   relation   to   the   family   structure,   Mrs.   Vaughn   brings   to   the   table   a   myriad   of

knowledge   to   motivate,   encourage   and   ignite   listeners   to   grow   enriched,   long-standing   marriages

established on the principle of "Oneness".



After receiving her Associates of Arts Degree in Liberal Arts from West Los Angeles College, Mrs.

Vaughn went on to secure several certifications in Child Development that deem her qualified to serve

as a Teacher in or Director over private preschools. Additionally, she obtained training as a Resource

for   Infant   Educarer   (RIE),   which   specializes   in  training   on   how   to   develop   self-confident   infants

without interfering with their natural abilities.



During   her   time   as   a   professional   nanny,   Mrs.   Vaughn   was   approached   by   the   Director   with   the

opportunity to teach the toddlers class at the Wilshire Boulevard Temple School in Los Angeles. In

this   new    capacity    she   was   able   to  further   enhance     her   proficiency    in  inspiring,    stimulating    and

promoting the growth of healthy families by applying her foundational gifts, as well as skills garnered

while serving as a professional nanny.



Mrs. Vaughn, who proudly donned the title of "Happy Marriage Advocate", has combined her gifts

and has chosen the path of promoting strong marriages, which are the underpinning of strong families

and stable homes. Through lessons she has learned throughout her 11 plus year marriage and 17 plus

years of child care, Mrs. Vaughn counts it an honor to share information on the tools necessary to start

and   maintain   a   marriage   interlaced   with   commitment,   friendship,   respect,   and   joy,   as   well   as   vital

information to raise children reflective of this marital environment.



As reflected in her favorite quote,  "A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers" by Ruth Bell

Graham, it is evident that through her dynamic lessons, you will learn how to significantly enhance the

lives of   your children, family, and community.



Mrs.   Vaughn   is   the   owner   of   Rainbow   Nannies   (a   nanny   placement   agency   in   Los   Angeles)   and

happily shares her life with Delandor, her husband of 11 years and their 6 year old son, Myles.



Mrs.     Vaughn     currently    conducts     Couples     Counseling     and    2-day    Intensives,    but   is  available   for

conferences,   special   events,   couples   retreats   and   more.   For   more   information   or   to   schedule   Mrs.

Vaughn for your next event, call 213-220-0917 or send an email to TyVaughn05@gmail.com.

Tags: Marriage

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